Sorry About The Delay

Howdy readers of the north, south, east and west! I just wanted to make a quick blog post to apologize about the recent slow down in my blog posting recently and explain the reasons behind it.

Basically overt he last week I’ve been hanging around in my hometown of Luton for easter because that’s the only week I’ve gotten to come back to see my family and friends before running back off to Sheffield to start uni again in a few days. Anyways, normally when I got home there’s a restriction about the amount of electricity and internet I can use so normally I’ll only get to use it every once in a while. And since I normally leave the house most times I don’t get enough time to sit down and get right into my blogging properly.

So yeah that’s why I have been posting things as quickly as usual, then add on top of that the fact that it was my sister’s 21st birthday yesterday and there was a lot of hyped building up to that, so again my blogging was put on hold. Unfortunately that meant that 3 of my posts from my Month of Nostalgic Video Game Reviews 2 have been late and I hate that, so once I get to Sheffield a few hours from now everything will be back on track hopefully and we’ll be full operational! So hang tight peeps and be patient with me! 😀 😀

 

Life and Stability

Good day to you people of WordPress and welcome to another blog post. It’s strange a haven’t made a done anything on my blog for a few days now which is very strange by my standards, though I have had a lot on and have had to change the material I was going to put up. So in the end I decided to talk about where I am in life and stability, two things that are quintessential to anyone trying to get by in this world.

My life since becoming a university student has been a turbulent rollercoaster ride of ups and downs that come with being a student away from home and living that lifestyle that you only here about it stories. While my experience here in Sheffield wasn’t like I anything expected, in a way I wouldn’t take it back because it’s all part of the learning experience and of course, growing up too.

Since coming to university I have realised that stability is a necessity, everything needs a sense of perspective and normality, without it things can go wrong, it can turn mess with you emotionally and send you into a world of chaos! In my case when I came to university to do my animation course I treated it like I did with college; I worked but I was also lazy a great deal of the time coz in my mind everything was stable enough for me to handle. My laziness never really came back to bite me in the arse until January when I had to had in 3 assignments in one day and let’s just say everything ended in a very messy fashion due to bad timing and computer malfunctions. It also didn’t help that while all of this chaos was going on in my course I had problems with my finances. To sum it up in an abbreviated fashion my accommodation cost more than the amount I got from student finance, so I was behind on many payments and in a constant fear of being kicked out. I had to borrow lots of cash off of my family, I had to sell my Nintendo DS and games and also cut down on the amount food I ate just to stay afloat. It was a dark time in my world that almost broke me completely. I lived in an unstable where everything was in a constant state of flux…

For a while this was the level of stability in my world…

Luckily things started to look up after March started up, there was my return to the cinema that got me back into a familiar groove when I went to see John Carter and The Hunger Games in one day in the Cineworld in Sheffield and then there was my birthday a few weeks ago that put me in the happiest place I’d been in for a long time. And I finally got a taste of stability when I paid off all of my money that I owed to my accommodation. All that fear and panic that had plagued my mind for months disappeared and I felt like a massive weight had been lifted off of my shoulders! So with this newfound level of freedom I went back home in the Easter and watched The Cold Light of Day, Wrath of the Titans and 21 Jump Street in the cinema which felt like the normal me. I also bought myself a Nintendo 3DS with Mario Kart 7 and Kid Icarus: Uprising which has put me in a good groove. Seeing my family back in Luton and London put a massive grin on my face (the free dinners made me epic happy! XD) and when I got to catch up with all my lovely friends in Luton and on one trip to Milton Keynes it was a great feeling!!

However it hasn’t been all plain sailing. When I came back home for Easter I was faced with many moments of frustration and  grumpiness because of the people around me and the overall atmosphere that comes with being back in Luton. Firstly let’s start with my friends, now don’t get me wrong I love my friends, they’re my heart and soul yo. And it is hard to live so far away from them in Sheffield whereas before I went to university they all used to be within walking distance back in Luton. So when I’m away they tell me so much that they wanna hang out and that they miss me, however when I got back most of them didn’t wanna hang at all besides a select few. And it’s not like I didn’t try to contact them, I sent text messages but they never got back to me or others I hollered at on Facebook who said they would hang out only from them to cancel or say that something had come up. That’s just a few of the scenarios that I’ve had to put up with. I think a lot of this was due to scheduling conflicts and the fact that I came back at an awkward time in the Easter when my friends had other plans. But some people really didn’t have an excuse as they didn’t have anything on and just didn’t get back to me. The main issue with some of my friends is the communication element. There is none.

Miscommunication. A very troublesome thing in life. It happens a lot to me.

I try to contact friends by every means possible and yet I never get a holla back. And that’s what really frustrated me when I spent my 12 days back in Luton. All those so-called friends really didn’t seem all that friendly and it was really annoying because a lot of them I wanted to see but couldn’t because they were useless in the communication department…

Also I didn’t realise until I hanged in Luton for a week how much the place saps the energy out of me. Outside of the cinema, my friends and seeing my family, there’s no reason for me to go back home for an extended duration of time. I mean I don’t hate the place and I have a lot of nostalgia there, but going back recently has just felt long, tiresome and funky. This Easter I saw a good few family members which was great, I got to hang with my best friends and went to the cinema and caught up on some long hours of TV. But other than that it just felt horrible. I missed Sheffield extremely after just a few days and wanted to get back there so soon. So yeah I got back to Sheffield at the start of this week and the normality of hanging around my flatmates kicked in and I felt at peace with myself. While I still have a fair amount of uni work to get on with in a short amount of time and I still haven’t got my finances completely sorted yet, I’m sure with hard work and a little hope I’ll get by. Plus I have a lot to look forward to with The Avengers coming out next Thursday here in the UK which I’m totally hyped and can’t wait for anymore and then in May I get see Men In Black 3 which will have to be good because its got Will Smith in it XD Also waiting to play Sonic 4: Episode 2 and break in my PS3 too. Then there’s the MCM London Expo, my place of happiness, I will be attending later on next month. And lastly of course the summer is edging ever closer so when that kicks in I’ll be bleeding it dry coz its my favourite time of year! So times can only get better from here 😀

Life is a balancing act, you could fall at any time if you’re not careful. So keep your guard up yo!

So in conclusion I just want to tell anyone who is reading this that life needs stability for it to be enjoyed and whatever problems or troubles you have in your life weather them out and find your own sea of tranquillity. I think I have finally found mine. How long it’ll last will be down to time and whether fate will keep me in my happy place. I just hope all of you out there have a level of stability of your own too because it is necessary for life.

 

Just not feeling the Christmas season

It’s weird, at this time of year I’m normally very happy, besides the Expo and my birthday, Christmas time is when I am at my jolliest and yet in 2011 I feel next to nothing. It’s not like I’m emotionless, but let me put it into this context; I used to love this time of year, it was always about the merry songs, togetherness with family and friends, getting fat over the amounts of food that you would consume and watching specific television shows, oh and getting some presents too 🙂 Though I can’t say I’m an overly materialistic kind of person because I don’t mind what I get for Christmas, heck I don’t mind if I get next to nothing because in the end my general love for this time of year would normally cancel everything else out. As said before I was just in it for the love of the season. But now I’m not bothered, besides seeing family and having time away from uni Christmas this year has been pretty ordinary. I’m sort of happy about it but at the same time I’m not overly fussed.

Christmas should be a jolly time for all, but not for me this year.

Now I can probably see several people coming at me saying “Scrooge! Scrooge!” But you would be wrong on many levels, I have had fun this time around, just like every year but there has been some degree of normality floating around which I haven’t been able to shake. And I think I realise today what the deal is with me. It’s that feeling you get when you realise something is missing. You know that one element that holds everything together which you normally have but don’t at that present moment. And today on Boxing Day I realise what is missing from my world that has made this Christmas so regular and not so special… It’s the magic. That’s right magic, normally at this time of year around early/mid-December there is a feeling in the air that fills your soul with happiness, this is what people interpret as the magic of the Christmas season. While a lot people claim that Christmas has lost its meaning in commercialism and all that jazz. I have never forgotten what Christmas is about. At this time of year we remember the birth of Christ (Jesus Christ for those not aware) and other than that it’s all about being with your family and loved ones and enjoying their company.

But ever since December started I couldn’t get into the groove of things. I mean I knew that Christmas was coming but I never felt anything towards it, it’s like I said to myself “I should be excited but right now I’m not bothered.” So I thought maybe that’s just random feeling. Maybe that’ll pass in time, however the days edged ever closer and my feelings did not change. Though I did get fairly jolly with me flatmates at uni when they busted out some Christmas songs and we would dance around the flat. I thought that would be enough, but even then it wasn’t. So then I thought “If anything will get me in the mood for Christmas it’ll be “Dubstep Santa” by the Daveyboys. That always works.” And so I went on YouTube and watched all 3 Dubstep Santa videos and it was lovely, I was in my element and it was creating this joyful feeling in my soul, so I thought with this maybe the magic will follow. However right up until the week when uni ended back on the 16th I still didn’t feel anything special or magical. Things were still average.

To be honest this is how I felt for the majority of the Christmas season.

So then I figured okay if go back home to familiar territory then in the last week leading up to Christmas everything will be fine, but then the travel back home happened… Ugh. The less said about that the better, I even wrote a blog on it if you wish to see my post about my suffering here: https://hypersonic55.wordpress.com/2011/12/18/my-terrible-episode-with-train-transportation/

So then after I got home I tried to get into that Christmas groove. But the feeling wasn’t coming, the magic wasn’t kicking in. I also didn’t get my normal Christmas stuff done like watching my favourite Christmas films or television specials on TV, DVD or VHS, my schedule was messed up. So over the last week I had been reacquainting myself with my family and meeting up with many friends, some of which I hadn’t seen for months, others I had seen for years. It was beautiful. I even obtained a PS3 after how many years of waiting and I even got back to the cinema for the first time in 3 months! I was having the time of my life. I even went out on Christmas Eve with my friends and even met up with several old mates while I was out, it was a great night and to be honest it was the closest feeling I got to that Christmas magic because I was having fun in the company of friends. 🙂

So then while I was out Christmas Day came and I was in a lovely groove, so with a good feeling in my soul I left my friends in town and headed home around 1am. My sister and I set up the PS3 and played Mortal Kombat 9 for a few hours while opening my presents. So after our little playing session we went to bed. Then we got up a good few hours later, opened the rest of our presents and then headed out London to hang at my Gran’s house which was the main aspect of Christmas that usually rules over everything else. And from there we had loads of food, did a lot of catching up and played card games for ages, none of which I actually won haha. However even after all of the television, food, family fun and games I wasn’t having the time of my life as I usually am, this was just an ordinary time. 😦 I think it also didn’t help that the rest of my cousins, aunts and uncles weren’t there too. In the end this Christmas was fun, I had gotten some fabulous presents and spent some great time with my family. But in the end it was nowhere near as fun or as amazing as the last few years. Unfortunately there was no magic and I wasn’t feeling the season in the way that I should be.

Anyway hope that y’all people of the world had a great Christmas and I’ll catch ya later 😀