Howdy people, time for another blog post. Today I have another aspect of my life to talk about on here and it relates to anger. In light of recent events concerning my new job I feel like I have to talk about my angry former self and how he tries to escape my mental prison on occasion.
Now before I talk about my current situation I feel like a little history lesson about me is in order. Before I was the person I am now, I used to be a very angry person. As a child I had a short temper and a lot of kids in school used to exploit that and then get me in trouble for it, and this continued into secondary school where I had to get anger management classes to curb me anger. It did help and kept me calm for the most part. While there were a few incidents in school after my classes ended which I won’t get into I eventually got myself under control. However throughout college there were moments where I’d raise my voice, get frustrated at myself or other people, lash out and so on and so forth. Even now while at uni it’s not something that’s completely been subdued, my angers fairly suppressed for the most part, but I can easily freak out given the right incentive.
So yeah with that little history lesson out of the way let’s move to yesterday night at work. As I said in the previous blog post there’s a guy known as “M” and over the last week and half he’s come across as a know-it-all, bossy, obnoxious little bastard who deserves a fucking punch in the face! See even those words right there are far more aggressive than I usually am. But sometimes there are people that get underneath your skin and make you feel aggressive and M is the kind of guy who after hanging around with him for a short amount of time makes you skip past being annoyed and move straight to being pissed off! Yesterday I raised my voice to him twice, once because he told me to speed but because I was drying things too slow and the second occasion was when he asked for help when I didn’t immediately help him. M moans like a little bitch, I know I can be slow at times but that’s no reason to talk down to me and expect me to pull some sort of fast-forward miracle out of my fucking ass!
Honestly just thinking about that point in time or just him in general just pisses me off. And the funny thing is all the other people at work feel the same way yo. I know its early days and you can’t be falling out with people in opening week, but I can’t stand being around him already. I want him gone!
I don’t know what some people may be thinking right now, but most of my current friends can’t imagine me angry in any capacity. I love it when I tell them about my past or my current angry episodes and they can’t believe it. But those who have known me for 6 years or more know about my aggressive side and some have been on the receiving end, so they know not to fuck with me.
In the end I don’t want to be in a position where my anger could cost me my job, so I have to keep calm and endure, though sometimes I feel like just freaking out and hitting people just because I can. It’s a stupid frame of mind, I know, but sometimes I feel the need to release my rage all at once. I think I may have to take up yoga yo. 😛